well that's a different way to look at things.

i'm fed up of being on the verge of tears all of the time, but i know i have to keep from letting the tears spill over my eyes because it would just magnify my annoyance with everything by about a million and four times. don't ask about the four, four is a good number. fourfourfour. i need some positivity and being around all of this endless murky hate every breathing minute isn't aiding my stress levels. sometimes i want to escape, and i know how to do that. blend in.

blending in is a way of hiding from everyone except yourself. i need to escape, hide, run away. but from myself. blending in seems like a bad idea now. nevermind.

anyway, i'd have to come back sometime, and wouldn't that just multiply my problems?

i need a hobby. i would write, but i'm empty and this post is the extent to my pathetic writing skills at the moment.. i miss the old me, but i can't remember who or where she is.

oh yeah, she's still with the people that stole her away and left a shell of a girl who ironically is now on the verge of tears.

xo